New Marc / Trauma is real

So about 10 days ago before I left town, I was in a Hannaford grocery store in Maine doing self checking out. I heard over the intercom “Security 114, Security 114.” And about a few seconds later, the self checkout attendant came over to where I was and put on some hand sanitizer.

My first thought was, was that announcement about me, or did it have absolutely nothing to do with me. And this is the point of today’s thoughts.

One of the several reasons that I am looking forward to moving somewhere new is to take myself out of a traumatic environment.

Back in the summer of 1990, the summer after my sophomore year at Gilman, I was walking down Roland Avenue, and I was stopped by two Baltimore City Police (I was wearing a Gilman sweatshirt).

I was patted down by the cops (it was a male and a female). And the male cop said that “there had been a series of break-ins in the neighborhood and I didn’t look like I belonged there.”

I got home later that day and called my mom and told her what happened, and she apologized that she hadn’t had the talk with me.

Fast forward to March 2025. I was driving down the same stretch of Roland Avenue, (around the shopping center) and I get pulled over by a police office. He said that I hadn’t stopped for a bicyclist in the cross walk, or something like that. He asked for my license and registration. A few minutes later, he returned both to me and let me go, without even giving me a ticket. Again, same question, am I being a paranoid, or am I still a black man who doesn’t look like he belongs in that neighborhood?

Which leads me to block busting, restrictive covenants, history etc….

And it hit me to thinking, Marc left the United States. You don’t have to obsess about Black History, get angry about the news (still doing that), watch you tube (still), etc…

And then I realized, I need to shed all of that and embrace my new surroundings and embrace the new Marc.